Tipsy In Cuba...

Well I hadn't seen Frank since last Saturday...Last night we chatted and I went on over.
The night started out fun...he was in the kitchen cleaning up...he looked so cute and I missed him, so I kept him company in the kitchen as he cleaned. He went on to tell me about some medical/dental issues and what not. At one point he wrote me a note, it said, 1. Holiday possibilities and 2. Etc...Not sure what it meant but was funny. As a joke I brought him those adult diapers I got as a free sample, as a joke, from these girls at work. It went over well and we laughed. At one point I said, "I don't know why I keep taking them from place to place every time I move." - He came back with, "moved? I know only of one, unless you're lying." I said, "I don't lie" -
We went on to have a drink or 2, he cracked out the cards and we played, "Hand and Foot" of course I lost. Even in those situations he is encouraging, "you're doing good", "that's a good hand."
Sitting back on the sofa, somehow we got on about weight loss, mine. He looked at me with a smile, and said, "Look at you, look how skinny you are." I'm shy in that situation as I don't like being told I look good or anything of that nature, in regards to my looks or body. but he went on on how Ive lost weight even since we've met. I said it was about 10lbs or so. He said how it shows in my face, how I have a totally different face from when we met. He took out his camera to try and snap a photo or 2 of me, to show me the change. I told him I don't like being photographed and we had a good giggle. At some point in the evening, he said, "Lets look at this vacation thing." To his PC we went, we looked at options. He sat next to me and was being sweet to me, its those moments I love and that make me smile. Those aren't moments I wouldn't share, with even my best friend, so to me they are special. We decided and booked it. Eventually, somehow, in regards to the confirmation email. I don't know how we got on the privacy of emails and I obviously said something wrong cuz a fury of anger flew around the room. I remember crying, I remember him telling me to get out of there, to leave his place, twice I remember. I went to get my jacket and shoes and asked that he call a cab. How I managed to stay, I don't know. It was such a great night and then that? I remember throwing myself in bed and that's it. I don't remember him coming to bed at all. But next thing..I wake up next to him, cuddled up against him. He got up first and went to make coffee. I got out and sat on the sofa, clutching a pillow. Frank said, "You always do that" I said I always have. He wondered if it was to hide my "fat" as it wasn't necessary. I said, "So, we going to give this holiday thing a go?" He hardly remembered booking the holiday. He said, "I don't know"..I said, "OK but let me know as soon as possible as its on my credit card." I went on to remind him that I charged it to my card and that we would redeem his points the following day(which I did). He then sorta made do, and got into it sorta. He said, "Going on holiday..." with a grin. He looked at his calendar and saw that he had already, last night, put a sticky note on his calendar. Then I said I would go make another pot of coffee, and he said that he could do it. I got up and said, "You got the first cup, Ill get the second, you can go get it when its ready." Off I went...second cup of coffee and some chat. Then dressed one more cuppa and off we went. Up the road we walked together and bid good bye at the top of the road. I did as I said I would do, and looked into the vacation pricing etc, and the hotel for the night before as the departure time for our trip is 6am. Sent him an email with the explanation and some links to hotels. I will see what happens. Last nights argument was about, like I said, privacy of emails. I'm not sure what happened. I remember saying to him, "you showed me those emails, you showed them to me." I remember at one point asking him, "how would you feel if I went out and got blow jobs from different guy?" - I never got a response, he was just quiet.
Part of me is thrilled to go away, period. Part of me is scared but excited about spending the week with Frank. See what happens, how we get on, or not for that matter. I don't know what to expect at all, and doing something like this is so not who I am, or was maybe. We have grown tight over the last few months, I think so at least. Another part of me thinks I can go without seeing him until next week, as long as we communicate I OK I think. I wonder what he is thinking about this, if anything. How will we be, spending that time together. Will we grow to dislike each other, or maybe grow fonder of one another? I asked for a hotel room with 2 bed for the stay overnight here, before our flight, will be odd. As well, I'm sure the room will come with 2 beds, so what happens? The norm, where we sleep together, all week? Then I think on the physical side. Last night things would have gone physical if the argument didn't happen. How will he/we, go the whole week without any sexual release in some form or fashion? My minds all over the place, in many ways. I'm happy to get away and spend the time with Frank all to myself with no intrusions. I wonder if I'm the only gay guy he has gone away with, I know his last holiday was alone. I mean he must like me to some degree to go on a holiday alone together. This is where my confusion lies. Why would he not go with the girlfriend? That wont leave my thoughts and wonder of the answer. I could go the way of, fuck it, its done. We will do our best to have fun and enjoy. I made a remark in regards to our departure time. "Leave at 6, get there by 10, drunk on the beach by noon." with a giggle. He responded, "ha ha, maybe you.", that speaks volumes to a certain point. Do we "vacation" differently? Things to do, things we eat....OK I'm going with, "I'm going away attitude." I'm trying to make it look that way, feel that way, as it is, just that I have the feelings not him, not in "that" way. Physical I think yea as he compliments me on it so much at times, and will touch me, feel me. I remember him doing that last night on the sofa.
I cant wait til we are tipsy in Cuba! ...
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