What Have I Done?

Well last night I decided to get on with my life, my nights, without this fella. I got home at about 9 or so, but I was getting emails from him while out for dinner and drinks and just wanted to go home once that started. I was afraid of getting emotional in front of my friend. Home I came and a little email chat began. He told me he wanted to talk in person and not via email, a good sign? I thanked him for getting back to me and not brushing me off, which honestly I didn't think he would do. He is a highly intelligent guy and the brush off like I thought, doesn't seem his character. At one point he he wrote, "Sorry you are feeling bad, but I am not." I'm not sure if that's in regards to "us", Ill have to find out I guess when we chat this out face to face. I did at one point say to him "Saturday night drinks and breakfast in the morning still" I got no response but he probably went to bed. I'm not going to lie, at this point I am nervous about seeing him. I wonder if his comments meant he didn't feel bad cuz he likes me? I need at this point to find out more about him. He said that when we met I was looking for a "good friend" but I guess I need to clarify that. Initially it was to look or find a cool guy to hang with, not sexually. It just sorta happened with this fella. I don't mind that its gone this way, but maybe I'm more invested than him. I need to find out about guys in his life? The woman in his life. What he wants from me?? Could he be with me? Does he want to be with me? Could he commit to one guy along with having his "mistress"?? I'm confused and at the same time relieved that he didn't cut me off. I'm thinking he may have work this morning and then head off to the island as it seems a nice day, so what? I wont see him til late tonight? I'm not sure but will keep u posted. I'm not going to lie, I am saddened by this turn of events as I didn't think Id feel anything for him. But then again, he is the one who kisses me and touches me, so I think he likes me to an extent? I cant just be a body to be next too. I saw the way he looked at me as I told some stories, he had this sweet look in his eyes, like he liked hearing my stories. I think he knows I'm a genuine guy, not a typical whorish fag - I'm not sure what to expect nor do I know what I have done??
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