Monday, October 31, 2011

See What Happens ...

Halloween 2011 is upon us...I sent Frank emails thru the day, about not wanting to be in this chaos that brews in my area on days like today. No bite. He told me to enjoy the shenanigans...There's no joy to be had as I don't want to be part of it. I told him of my horrendous ride home on TTC, and he asked why. I told him, to get home earlier and that if he wanted company. Its still early in the evening, but did say to him, "sorry I keep saying that I just enjoy laughing with you and your company" - my last words for the evening. I called and left a similar message - so, the message, he must have gotten. I feel like a moron, like he is in total control cuz of how I feel for him, not reciprocated. I know he likes me, I'm not an idiot. Why would he/we do the things we do if he didn't. I just wish there was that, "I miss you" from him. He told me Friday, that he told me to "get a taxi" cuz he wanted to see me. So I'm sure h does at times. I will wait til a certain point then give up on tonight and mention nothing of it, that I'm not bothered by it at this point, was just a suggestion, then need to leave it up to him, but Ive done that before and I cant hold back. Maybe he sees a pattern and feel to put no effort in this, as I will? I dont think that is the case, I just don't know. I will keep you posted on Halloween evening, if there is communication, if there is anything - I'm not holding my breath but could dash outta here at the drop of a hat. I want to stick to nada tonight together and see what happens...
x

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